I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
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