Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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