How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Randomize
