I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
We left an ass print on the piano.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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