PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Randomize
