dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Randomize
