My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
nutella sex= disaster
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
