Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
