She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
