Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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