You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
