I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
