Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
It's Friday. Sex?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
