nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
