she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
