if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
