Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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