cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
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