I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
party gras won. party gras always wins.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
