dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
