You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
