What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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