wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
only you would photoshop your dick
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
