I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
