Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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