What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
