Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
