Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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