Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
