I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
