But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Randomize