in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Randomize
