What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
