Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
