I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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