He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
