there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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