i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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