We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
