She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize
