tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
