I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Randomize
