I don't remember. Are we still dating?
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
