Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
