i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
