All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
