apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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