Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize