...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
