dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
